Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
