We're like a lot better than the average bears
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
