i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
