try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
