Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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