MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
