how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
