What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
