Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
