My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Randomize
