Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
