I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
