You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
