I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
