She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
