my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize