the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
