It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
