Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
