scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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