im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
