Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
