used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
