there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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