Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Randomize
