Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
its not stalking. its research.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Randomize
