I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
