u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize
