Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
