One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
