I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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