oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
