someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize