the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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