i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
