so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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