The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
