how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
