I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I think a kid would responsible me up
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
