Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
He did a backflip because drugs
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
