By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Randomize
