maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize