Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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