if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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