It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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