Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I just want to make out with him forever
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize