everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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