I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
