Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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