drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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